Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Ross Hudgens of Authentic Marketing.
There’s an increasing amount of awesome content regarding personal development swirling around the internet. Since almost everyone on the planet has some desire to improve, there is a large market of people who want to write about it as well — and everyone with a voice has a real, valid strategy for improving your life, because they likely used that strategy to improve their own.
That’s great, that’s awesome, and I love it. The more, the merrier. There is no one right way to get better – there’s only your way, and how your way splices together all the advice from these differing talents.
Despite that, there is definitely something that people, including me, fall victim to when they jump in the personal development whirlpool. Most people add fifteen blogs to their RSS, find an assortment of improvements they could make to their life, and expect instant change the next day. They’ll set off in the next twenty-four hours with about ten to fifteen new things to tweak to become the “super” edition of the previous day’s version of themselves.
But there’s a problem – these short-term fixes will NEVER become long term improvements.
Even if they chose to pick only four things to improve on at the same time, the odds of success are surprisingly low. Three things, or even two is sometimes stretching it, depending on the mindset and workload of the person we’re talking about.
It’s easy to make five subtle changes all at once. Stop eating as much sugar. Exercise that day. Smile at two neighbors. However, it’s hard to concentrate on these five improvements for a long duration of time, and inevitably, one or two will get lost in the shuffle.
The reason for this is mental conditioning. Some studies say simple tasks require eighteen days to condition, or more specifically, thirty to forty repetitions. Do you really think that you can handle five improvements at once, repeat them each forty times, balance a busy schedule, and juggle other life commitments in order to make these improvements habitual?
No – it’s just not possible.
Take a deep breath…
Slow down for a second. Look at one or two things you really want to do, and devote concerted effort to them for the next two or three weeks. Eventually, you’ll stop thinking about them; they’ll just come naturally.
When this happens, you’ve hit the light-switch moment when you’ve conditioned yourself into a new habit.
It’ll be hard to identify this period because you would be contradicting yourself thinking about the fact that you no longer do whatever the bad habit was – but it’s possible to think about it in times where it doesn’t apply, and notice that you’ve overcome the plight you once had.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t read personal development blogs. On many occasions, the entertainment value alone makes the task worthwhile. But when you do, don’t think of them as day-to-day things to incorporate – if so, you’re just putting the bloggers’ effort to waste. If you see something good, write it down and add it to a list, ranked by priority, of ways you can improve your life. Adopt one or two tasks at a time, make them a habit, and move on. By doing this, you’ll make yourself better instead of just pretending you are.
So do yourself a favor, and make this post one of the first improvements you make. Not the sixth. Or the seventh. The first.
Ross Hudgens blogs at Authentic Marketing, where he brings together insights about personal development, marketing, search and social media. For more from Ross, subscribe to his RSS feed or follow him on Twitter.
13 Comments on “How to Avoid Personal Development Overload”
says:
Always good to pull back and look at the big picture.
Slowly, over the last few years, I’ve given up items I used to take through an I.V.: soft drinks, coffee, and iced tea. Lots of sugar and caffeine are gone…feeling younger, and my thoracic cavity actually relaxed.
Bonus: My husband noticed that my skin is no longer dry… before I took notice!
Tackled it one addiction at a time.
Yours is good advice.
says:
Well done DJ! Sometimes, one addiction will knock out the other and you won’t even have to think about it. Maybe you’re overweight – if you think about sugar alone, the weight will stop to drop. Then fast food, etc. Healthy lifestyle makes unhealthy no longer enjoyable.
Keep it up!
says:
I love personal development blogs and definitely would be totally over the edge right now if I tried to implement everything I read. Lucky for me, my focus is minimalism, so that has been keeping me in line in terms of how many things I try to change at once.
says:
Hi Ross, I love your message here. There seems to be a growing trend of people who want a quick fix in their life. I believe any positive change or improvement that we are trying to make in life takes dedication and commitment. Whether it’s getting more confidence, becoming more focus, overcoming fear, or even just waking up at 5 AM every morning, these are all things that cannot be accomplished overnight.
For example, one of the struggles that I face in life is battling with OCD. There are days where I can go without washing my hands between around 20 to 40 times a day. After those days, I’m very proud of myself and wish that the next day can be the same.
However, it’s rare when they are. It takes a lot of focus, commitment, and discipline in order to go through days where I’m not allowing most of my irrational thoughts to rule my mind, my emotions, and my life. And in order to continue this journey of self-healing, I often need to remind myself to that I can’t focus on 3, 4, 5, 6 different things a day.
That’s why I like your message here. Anything we want to change in life, we need to realize that it doesn’t take one or two days. I believe it takes one or two good months of “concerted effort” like you say. You have to get it where you don’t even have to “think” about it; that’s when you realize the personal development change is done for good.
Finally, I’m not saying we shouldn’t learn new things in the personal development realm. We should always be learning from people, increasing our knowledge, and growing our awareness, but we just need to take it one step out a time. I appreciate how you remind us of this concept. Thank you.
says:
Hulbert, thanks for the thoughtful reply. The internet started with a “quick rich” scheme, and maybe, then, it was even possible. But as it’s matured and everything’s matured, that has died. There’s only the long, big hill. I quote I heard recently was “It’s not about getting rich quick – it’s about getting rich slowly and enjoying the journey while getting there.”
Thanks for revealing a bit about yourself here, as well. I wish you all the best, and with a clear concise a message as you just left (and the blog that you write/speak on), I have no doubts that you are winning the battle with OCD.
says:
Definitely Jean. There is no perfect bullet. Many times when we try to do everything at once, we can actually make ourselves worse, as some of the positive things about us get ignored to try and weigh all these new improvements.
says:
Jeffrey – I’m a fairly new reader here, but I’m consistently relating to your ideas and outlook on life and work. I’m excited for your latest decision and I look forward to reading about how it works out for you.
says:
Welcome to The Art of Great Things, Justin! I’m really glad you’re here – I always love finding kindred spirits. What are you working on right now?
says:
Thanks for the welcome Jeffrey. I’m working on a few things… I just graduated Maryland Institute College of Art with an MFA in graphic design and I am adjusting to the transition from full-time graduate work to being a full-time design practitioner. I’ve got a few personal projects lined up including a book-proposal, a business-proposal, and a slew or other things. Perhaps I could tap your virtual shoulder for some feedback?
says:
Great advice Ross. I’m like Jean. I love reading personal development blogs and I write one too. Slow and steady that’s what has always worked for me. Examining the reason I want the change is also key. Make it meaningful. But I agree, one or two steady, doable changes at a time. Nice post. Thanks Jeffrey for great content, and love the new look.
says:
Thanks Katie! Appreciate the kind words. Slow and steady wins the race.. or some other cliche like that. :)
says:
Thank you for this Ross. As I sift through 10 new article updates in my inbox regarding personal development, I think I know what you’re saying… A lot of people (including myself at times) get caught up reading about personal development being the end goal. That is just the medium for change. The end goal is actually doing something to improve your life. Making positive and more fulfilling changes to life. So on that note, maybe it makes more sense to pick one thing and focus on it all year. I have a buddy who reads one book a year and then spends the year applying it. There is some logic to that. But I love reading and learning too much to go that extreme. The action part of reading is what I focus most on at ReadingForYourSuccess because I don’t want everyone to get lost in the words and forget the actions.
I love reading all this personal dev stuff online but it does not keep me from turning the knowledge into tasks and then into useful actions. That is where the real development happens.
Very well done Ross,
Scott